‘A picture is a secret about a secret, the more it tells you the less you know’. Diane Arbus

June 14th

Light Strokes 

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Robert and I went for a walk recently, fortuitously choosing what turned out to be a perfect combination of time of day and atmosphere: low tide and near to sun’s set.

The kelp at Lawyers Head was amazing to see, lying in rich-brown heaps exactly where dumped by the ocean’s swinging arm.

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There were other things too to take the eye. I started clicking my camera and couldn’t seem to stop seeing colours and textures to capture.

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IMG_1305.JPGblack, glistening rocks taking a breather before the next wash by an incoming tide

IMG_1307cerise seaweed …

IMG_1312rocks stained by the iron oxide in the run-off (so I was informed by someone more knowledgeable than myself)

IMG_1313concrete slab from man-made sea wall, torn away by the ocean …

IMG_1318a popular pooch spot, going by the paw prints …

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IMG_1298light strokes over the surf painted by a sinking sun

So. Sent off the manuscript. Four months now to wait until I hear whether it has been accepted for publication.

Meanwhile, I am hatching the second part. I was going to introduce a whole raft of new characters, but the characters already introduced had something to say about that! They want me to keep them on. Their stories are not done. So it looks as though they will remain, but I will also be introducing some new characters as well. Plus a whole new plot.

Imagining Part Two is what keeps me awake at night. I can’t turn off my brain and the onslaught of ideas.

But at least keeping my mind engaged in the hatching and plotting of Craggan Dhu: Part Two, is good armour against any nasty, unruly jolts of anxiety that can sometimes arrive just as I am about to fall asleep – like rapier attacks cruelly aimed to prevent the bliss of sleep.

Such unfounded, indiscriminate anxiety usually swirls around the question of what is the meaning of life, and other such boring, existential questions like who am I really? And what if my life is really just all a dream; some cruel hoax?

Then morning dawns and all is well again; proof that to combat confusion, a good dose of daylight does not go amiss. That, and a walk by the sea.

June 6th

Flax and Sun

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Te Waewae Bay

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Monkey Island beach

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This long weekend we took a trip south to ancestral lands.

My novel “Craggan Dhu’ (yet to find a publisher) was ringing in my ears. So much of its grist has been milled from these parts.

The characters in my novel were singing and dancing with me as I stomped the ground and sniffed in the scent of flax and sun. (Well, to be honest, a couple of them were griping, it not being in their nature to sing and dance).

May 24th

Blue Notes 

As promised, I have taken myself down to the sea. Twice this week so far.

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I wondered why I had left it so long. After all the beach is only a stone’s throw from our place (3 – 4 k’s at the most …)

Then I realised that I actually prefer the beach in the cooler months. Not so many people. Not so  windy. The colours muted and peaceful.

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I especially love the blues …  the white froth adding contrast.

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On Monday the breakers were steaming and frothy after a storm over the weekend.

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I am posting off my novel’s m.s. to a publisher this afternoon.

Then I shall to the best of my ability, forget all about it and get back to poetry and writing down ideas I have brewing for the second part to my Craggan Dhu saga.

It will be sweet to get back into some in-depth strumming again after so long just picking out sporadic notes.

The timing is right; it is nearly Matariki (the appearance of the Pleiades over the horizon). That is when my writing really hits its stride. The universe and me in tune.

Photos above taken by me with I-Phone 5

May 12th

Promised

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From 2011 –  detritus on St Kilda beach

I can hear the beach calling me. Its been a while since I’ve visited.

Last night I pulled away from social media, vowing not to return until Spring (and even then I’m not sure I’ll want to join the crowds at the watering hole again).

I want to take time to listen and read. Think and dream. Without the white noise of checking status and Like-ing things people post. Reminds me of the days of intense blogging and the self-imposed obligation I felt back then to read and comment on every blog I followed.

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rocks at Cosy Nook

Writing has had to take a back seat lately as I have been busy with getting our apartment downstairs ready for Air BnB placement.

Our son and family who were living in our home, have moved on to another city so we have moved back upstairs into what feels like an manor (after living for two years in the cosy apartment downstairs).

At the same time, however, we can now see all the work needed to update and re-touch the rather faded and shabby interior. (Something we have been talking about doing for ten years).

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Cosy Nook rocks (2)

If there’s such a thing as a ‘Magical Places of the World’, Cosy Nook in Western Southland, New Zealand (and just down the road from where I was brought up) would surely comply. Such magical places serve as inspiration for me to get writing.

Yes, I really do need to get back to writing. And back to the beach for a shot of salt and surf.

Photos taken by me with Canon S3

April 11th

Novel Mountain Climbing

3 sistersThree Sisters peak, Remarkables mountain range, Queenstown, New Zealand

Yes, writing a m.s. for a novel and getting it all ready to send to a publisher, can be a bit like climbing a mountain.

Not that I have ever climbed a mountain.

But I have written a m.s. for a novel.

mountainsRemarkables mountain range, Queenstown

If only I could just wave a magic wand.

Or had staff.

(A magic staff?)

Then I could magically skip the stages to ‘getting the thing published’ and just  concentrate on the fun part – the actual writing.

sunset on remarkables in wintersunset reflected on to Remarkables mountain range, Queenstown

The light at the top of the mountain seems like a very long way away at the moment.

All of the above photos were taken by me with a Canon S3

March 27th

Seven- Year String Theory / It’s Just A Theory

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Feeling a bit like this kite these days – free, yet tethered. Free to write, yet tethered to themes. Themes of forgiveness, celebration, exploration, hurt and grief.

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Entering new ground … I am settling into my tenth seven-year stage. One of active participation after the previous seven-year stage which was of a more pondering, meditative nature.

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It’s as if for those seven years, I was gathering my strength and confidence for this seven-year stage. (This stage, from ages 63 – 70 corresponds to when I was aged 7 – 14; and then again when I was aged, 28 – 32).

I look back on my life and for me, there is a clear pattern of entering new phases every seven years. These seven years then fall into a twenty-eight year pattern.

I’ve lived through the twenty-eight year sequence twice now.

The first seven years I have titled the Learning years.

The second seven years the Active years.

The third block of seven years, the Weathering years.

The fourth seven-year stage, Celebration years.

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After experiencing my third time of living through the Learning (exploring, pondering, meditative, gathering) stage, I am now in my third round of Active years. These years appear to take on the nature of participation, curiosity and energy.

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I liken it to the butterfly – the first stage is as an egg – still, waiting, gathering; then as a hungry caterpillar – devouring, participating, working and energetically experiencing; then as a cocoon – weathering life’s harder times, dreaming, passive and patient; then the last phase, which is the butterfly fully formed and celebrating its freedom of flight.

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portion of a painting by Michael D. Cooke

This ‘seven-year string’ theory of mine has no scientific or mathematical basis. It is purely something I have concocted for myself in wakeful hours of trying to get to sleep. It amuses me to look back over my life and divide the years lived into these seven year stages.

My first Active phase was when I was aged 7 – 14 and delighting in my roles of daughter, sister, granddaughter, niece, cousin, friend and school pupil.  Simple roles, easy to fulfil. By the time I was into my second Active stage (35 – 42) , I had added the roles of wife, mother, aunt, teacher and writer. Again, delightful roles I revelled in.

Now, third time round, the roles of daughter and granddaughter have been taken away from me. But I have the delight of the added roles of grandmother, published writer and retiree. And I am still revelling.

Aint life just the grandest thing?

March 14th

Green

Japanese frog

I thought I had lost this photo of a little frog we saw in my daughter-in-law’s parent’s garden in Okayama, Japan.

It was one of those moments that stick in your mind. I spotted the wee fellow when E’s father was showing us around their amazing garden – a garden that warrants the term ‘Market Garden’ back here in New Zealand.

Sadly E’s father died a few years later. I am pleased that I am left with fond memories of him and of E’s family home and garden, of the dinner served to us that moon festival night, and of the over-whelming hospitality of her parents. It was a magical time, a portrait worthy of occupying a special position in my hall of memories.

green caterpillar (tomatoes)

from a few seasons back now, a row of green tomatoes hopefully ripening on our windowsill (if I remember correctly it didn’t work, Dunedin’s day-long length of sunshine quickly waning as March marched on into April).

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green tomatoes

While going through old blog posts, I came across the photos (featured above) I forgot were in my stock.

I decided to feature ‘green’  – possibly in deference to St Patrick’s Day, which happens to be the day after our youngest son’s birthday. I’m glad though that our son wasn’t born on St Pat’s Day. Not the greatest to every year have your birthday overshadowed by so much mad green.

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munted tennis ball washed up on to the St Kilda beach tide line

I spent a successful week’s writing last week.

I achieved it by pretending I was ‘away’  (possibly at a writer’s retreat somewhere).

For all intents and purposes, I was not home if anyone tried to find me. I didn’t answer  the phone – anyway, it would only have been scammers or random companies soliciting takers for home heating, or real estate agents wanting to value our house.

I told people I was going to ‘be away’ for the week and locked the door and applied headphones.

I didn’t venture out even to collect the mail. (Although I did sneak away for a few walks and a couple of visits to the gym. Necessary prevention of leg and gluteal muscle atrophy from so much sitting).

My entire week’s focus was on slightly adjusting the ms for my novel – incorporating some helpful suggestions by my ‘readers’. Really happy with the result too. Thank you dear readers (you know who you are).

Now all I need to do is to write out some family trees as an aid to the book  – which is going to tax this very right-leaning brain of mine. (“Come on left brain – wake up. Help me out, there’s a chum”).

I’ve been encouraged by my achievement of opting out of society to spend a week fully engaged in writing. I now know it is possible to achieve this without having to leave town. Saves  spending money I don’t have on petrol, accommodation and extra supplies. I now know I can assign myself regular Writing Weeks. And I will.

Even a studio or office is not necessary.  Just a diary empty of any commitments, locked front door and the appearance of absence, buys me a writing retreat for zilch. That’s win-win in my book (a rhetorical book, you understand, not my actual book).

My actual book is just about there. Will be sending it off with a hope and a prayer very soon.

And then what?

Craggan Dhu; Part Two (and more poetry for collection number four).

February 27th

Pondering On

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A walk around the neighbourhood …

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with camera aboard …

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painted bus shelter …

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brick wall in the Andersons Bay Plunket Rooms corner …

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where I sat a while and watched the world go by …

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and farther out towards the harbour in the distance, boat sheds and a portion of Dunedin’s wharf-side vista …

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until it was time to leave my sunny spot by the ivy-ed wall …

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and head on home, past this elegant villa …

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with a Lilliput library outside the gate …

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A friend of mine is responsible for getting these little free libraries up and running in different places in Dunedin. She is also responsible for poetry cards in waiting rooms nationwide and for poems-painted-on-steps. She’s heading for a Service medal of some description, for sure. Soon I will have to call her ‘Lady’. She’s just that kind of amazing generator for the community … Someone is bound to nominate her. Hell, I might even do it. (If I can be biffed to get my butt up off this sun-soaked wooden seat, that is).

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People like my friend astonish me. Where do they get the energy? I need the day to give me a good shove before I can even get going in the mornings.

‘Every morning I wake as if from the dead’ (I think that may be a line from one of my poems, and if it isn’t, it should be).

People like my friend don’t go daydreaming and wandering and sitting on wooden benches watching the world go by. They are the world. The rest of us sit idly by and watch.

Now isn’t there a poem about that somewhere? Written by someone really famous?

Meanwhile … I am mentally revving myself up to make a massive tackle on my  novel’s m.s. Feet are skidding a bit in the mud though. I’m needing a bucket of sand  for traction.

I have been planning a write-away . A writing getaway. Somewhere quiet in a secret location. Free of charge. But I think that thought just took off with the pig I saw fly past.

February 15th

Still Coming Up Roses

I cannot believe it!!! (And yes, it does qualify for three exclamation marks). 

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little mousie brown at the foot of the Peter Pan statue at Dunedin Gardens, his ears shiny from people rubbing them

The latest photos which I put up to replace the first lot that went missing, were also gobbled up by some mysterious interweb quirk …

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upended again

However, I think  I may have worked out that the url for the page was from an old blog and somehow when I updated in a different sequence, the whole thing went wooshing off the cliff … very weird.

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Hopefully I’ve solved it by starting up a whole new page that is not connected to any old url. 

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Look at me getting all techy!

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even though this summer has apparently been New Zealand’s second worst on record (I wonder when the worst summer was?) the roses still all bloomed, so it can’t have been all that bad

Squeezing writing time in between catching up with friends and gym and normal life is not cutting it for the my m.s. corrections, so I’m eyeing up somewhere to go for some dedicated writing time, and ordering my calendar accordingly.

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